Man, that banan split would have been good.

STRESS! STRESS! STRESS!!!!!!!!!

Ugh. I hate stress. Let me rephrase that, I hate perceived stress. I work 12 hour days, 3 days a week, I have an hour long commute each way, I have two kids , and a husband whose work schedule is worse than mine, but on the average day, I wouldn't say that was stressful. Getting up at 5 am and getting home at 7 pm isn't stressful.

Right now, however, my professional life is up in limbo. I don't know exactly where I'm going professionally. I've never had the opportunity to be in this position before, and that is STRESSFUL!

Well, what have I done before in times of stress...I ate. Usually ice cream, preferable with sauce, whipped topping, and nuts. I can taste it even now just talking about it. So, today when discussing jobs and possibilities, and I just busted out with, "honey, I want a banana split". It was such a reflex, and I really had to stop and think about what I was doing because DH would have gone and gotten it for me.

It's still a reflex for me to soothe with food. I don't know when or if that will get better. I was ok this time, and I didn't fall into the trap, but what will happen next time? When will I be able to NOT think of food first when I am stressed? It's giving me more stress that I am handling things in my old "fat girl" ways. I know I am not where I was 5 months ago, but I am not "cured either". I wonder if I ever will be...

S-WW smoothie, skim milk
B-oatmeal
L-salsa chicken, brown rice, guacamole
S-plain ff yogurt, banana, blueberries
D-large salad, evoo and vinegar
S-peach

WPA's-none
Activity-none
Water-120 0z